My son Kendrick is about to turn 2 this Sunday, so I dedicate this story to him.
My own growth and healing always help me become a better mom. But just as often, the reverse happens. Learning how to take care of a child teaches me how to take care of me, too.
In one of my favorite books on mindfulness, No Mud, No Lotus, Thich Nhat Hahn uses motherhood as a model for how to handle suffering. He says:
“Suffering is a hurt child crying out to us…. The work of mindfulness is first to recognize the suffering and second to embrace it. A mother taking care of a crying baby naturally will take the child into her arms without suppressing, judging it, or ignoring the crying. Mindfulness is like that mother, recognizing and embracing suffering without judgment.”
— Thich Nhat Hahn, No Mud, No Lotus
Reading this, I knew I was already doing this with Kendrick, all the time. In fact, these times, especially when they happen between midnight and 4am, have become some of my most precious moments with him. (No, really.)
I had another article I wrote to share this week, and I’m still posting it today. But after last night’s presidential election results, which were devastating to myself and so many people I know, I had to address it here and now.
Dearest friends and fellow “woke” folks: We have a big problem. And (as gently and as kindly as I can), I must tell you that we are a part of that problem.
Though our society says that no crime should go unpunished, that when we make our bed, we must then lie in it, and that strength comes from “sucking it up, buttercup,” I’m going to advocate for something radical:
Self-blame stops us from taking responsibility for our actions.
This idea seemed crazy to me as recently as 6 months ago. At that time, I was all about the self-blame.
“It’s been a long time.
We shouldn’t have left you
without a dope beat to step to.”
— Timbaland, “Try Again” with Aaliyah
I’m thrilled to share that I’m relaunching this blog with a renewed purpose, mission, and all-new content.
While this blog has been an aspiration and a yearning of mine for at least 5 years, I was never quite able to find my own voice with it. Something in me was holding back, was confused about exactly what to write, and couldn’t pick the right words. It was frustrating, because I knew there was something I really, really wanted to share with you, to express.
I’m coming back to this blog after a long pause. During that time, I kept intending to redesign and repurpose it, until I realized:
a) that would take too long, and
b) I’d rather not let an outdated design stop me from writing.
Going forward, I plan to write less from the standpoint of a coach, and more about my own personal journey towards unconditional love. I hope that openly sharing my authentic journey and my learnings along the way will help others as much as it will help me. xo
I didn’t sleep well last night.
Awaking in the wee hours of the morning, I became caught in a storm of worries about my business, CrossFit Kindred. Little nagging what-ifs and gotta-dos, insignificant specks filling up my mind until I was drowning in quicksand.